Playgroup Disasters

Tumbling tots that can play the drums, do the backstroke, paint a mural, strike a yoga pose, and even play soccer at the tender age of two. Can your tot do all that? Well, that is what the plethora of playgroup experiences can offer the new mom nowadays.

Can we say-STRESS!

Yikes, I expected to feel anxiety when my son started Kindergarten or tried out for the high school basketball team but with the crazy amount of offerings out there-one might feel a bit-well-crazed when their child hits two years old. Welcome to the age of playgroup dates.

There are music classes, swim, gymnastics, yoga, art expression, and a myriad of choices at local businesses, churches, community centers, zoos, museums, etc. Nevermind, the impromptu play dates at another mom’s house-that’s another whole story! It is enough to exhaust an already thoroughly exhausted mother.

Worst, what if you feel your child’s chances of getting into Harvard, on the sports team, or being the next Picasso depend on these early play date experiences and he/she hates the playdate! They cry, stomp, and demand to go home! Or worse you want to go home after feeling like a play date loser! Double stress!

The question begs being asked-are all these playgroup dates really necessary? Do we really need a pre-school experience to a pre-school experience?

Sure, there is a myriad of stats to show that early exposure to music, art, sports, water, you name it, help to develop the child. But wouldn’t a tambourine to some Dan Zanes music at home or kicking a soccer ball around in the backyard do the same trick?

My opinion, if your tot and you love it-great! But, if it doesn’t work out-laugh it off and join the ranks of the numerous play date dropouts….like me.

Love to hear what others think-do you have a playdate drop out experience? Or want to share how your little one simply blossomed in a playdate experience?

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Murphy's Laws of Parenting
by Jennifer Saltiel. Share your favorite Murphy's Law of Parenting!

-Upon removal of the baby's bib, even after baby has burped, the baby will inevitably spit up.
-Hand-me-down outfits stay perfectly clean. New ones are spit up on.
-Corollary #1: The more the outfit cost, the more the baby will spit up on it.
-Corollary #2: If mother is wearing a ratty old T-shirt, not a drop of drool will come out of baby's mouth. If mother puts on a new cashmere sweater, whammo!
-If baby has been an absolute angel all day while alone with mother, baby will fuss and cry the minute a play date begins.
-The baby will sleep when mother needs her to be awake (like during a music class or when someone has dropped by to see the precious one) and stay awake when mother needs baby to be asleep (for instance, at 10pm when mother wants to go to bed).
-Baby shall always achieve a new milestone, such as rolling over onto her tummy, the minute mother leaves the room. Someone else will witness it, in order that mother may be told how great it was and what a shame it was that she missed it.

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The Price of Kids...
This is the first time I have seen the rewards listed this way. The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from
birth to 18 and came up with $160,140. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition. But $160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down.

* $8,896.66 a year,
or
* $741.38 a month,
or
* $171.08 a week.
now...
* That's a mere $24.24 a day
at
* Just over a dollar an hour.

Still, you might think the best financial advice is don't have children
if you want to be "rich." Actually, it is just the opposite.

So what do you get for your $160,140?

* Naming rights. First, middle, and last
* Glimpses of God every day.
* Giggles under the covers every night.
* More love than your heart can hold.

* Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
* Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.
* A hand to hold, usually covered with jelly or chocolate.
* A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites
* Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.

For $160,140, you never have to grow up. You get to:
* finger-paint,
* carve pumpkins,
* play hide-and-seek,
* catch lightning bugs, and
* never stop believing in Santa Claus.
You have an excuse to:
* keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,
* watch Saturday morning cartoons,
* go to Disney movies, and
* wish on stars.

* You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother's Day, and cards with backward letters for Father's Day.

For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:
* retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,
* taking the training wheels off a bike,
* removing a splinter,
* filling a wading pool,
* coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.

You get a front row seat to history to witness the:
* first step,
* first word,
* first day of school,
* first date,
* first time behind the wheel,
* graduation day from high school & then college, and
* wedding days and grandchildren.

You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great grandchildren.

You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice,
communications, and human sexuality that no college can match. In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God. You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broke! n heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits.

So one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost.
And that is a great deal for the price!!!!!
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